Posts Tagged ‘Lies’

Posts Tagged ‘Lies’

Hi Jane!

7.19.2010 | 5 Comments

A recap of my life for those who may be new to the blog:

In between my charity work with the poor, and my 24-hour, on-call, volunteer position with the Saving-Kittens-From-Burning-Buildings Society, I am climbing Mt. Kilimanjaro to raise money and awareness for The Delta Hospice Society.

Although it’s certainly filling up my schedule with planning and preparation, I still have time each week to teach underprivileged children how to ride bikes, and I’m also able to fit in my bi-weekly visit to the farm where they rescue and rehab racing greyhounds. I am also quite content with keeping my position as President of the Board for the Real Men Don’t Eat Sea Urchins Society.

I am certainly able to continue with my PhD thesis on Caring for the Caregiver, but unfortunately I’ve had to cut down my daily trips to the SPCA to walk the dogs and clean the cat cages. Alas, I can only do that 3x a week now. It breaks my heart, but sometimes life gets in the way of life, doesn’t it?

However full my life may become with all my work to better the lives of others, I will always happily make time to speak with my wonderful, loving mother everyday, and also to lavish attention and an appropriate amount of chaste affection on my significant other (who was obviously raised very, very well).

So to those of you who may be just tuning in to this humble blog, I welcome you, and would like to take this opportunity to let you know that I am a very good person who respects others.

Especially mothers.

Of sons.



What a Day for a Hike!

2.07.2010 | 1 Comment

This morning I braved the cold (of my underground parking garage), and Ali braved the elements (running across her driveway in the misty rain to my waiting car), and together we forged ahead (to Ricky’s). We faced difficult decisions (sourdough or whole grain?), endured tests of strength (those little creamers can be hard to open!), and stared in the face of mountains (…of hashbrowns).

Together we discussed important aspects of the journey (bathroom: down the hall to the left), questioned the imperative issues (is it Superbowl Sunday? I thought that was at Thanksgiving or something), and pondered the breath-taking beauty around us (Non-smoking restaurants RULE).

We fought hard-won battles (over the bill), but we were prepared (cash, debit, credit). And when the time came for us to leave it all behind (plus a 20% tip), we did so full of pride, joy, and renewed vigor (in a word: coffee).

Another morning spent in the beauty of nature!


Mathematical Escapism

1.22.2010 | 3 Comments

Mount Kilimanjaro is 19, 340ft tall, which is about 5.90km. It takes me about 80 minutes to run 10k. So, by my calculations, I should be able to climb Mount Kilimanjaro in about 40 minutes.



I need Help

1.09.2010 | 1 Comment

When discussing the idea of climbing Mt. Kilimanjaro with people, I am met with many different reactions. I know that people are supportive, but sometimes it’s funny how that “support” is portrayed. For example, a friend of mine recently decided to point out:

Six kilometres straight up! It’s like doing The Chief 8½ times without a break!

Thanks. I really needed to hear that.

I’m trying to avoid the reality of this situation for as long as possible. Right now I’m thinking that I’ll be needing some good shoes, a few granola bars, some water and a good porter to get myself up this rather large hill. I like it when people keep me somewhat ignorant. It keeps the fear at bay for a little while longer.

Recently I was taking the bus into Vancouver (you know, I’m not even going to comment on the changes to the 601, mkay?), and I was going to walk to the bus loop on the other side of town. My mother asked me if I’d like a drive to the loop, and I thanked her but replied that I would rather walk. “Walk?!”, she says, “All the way there?!”

Considering I am climbing “six kilometers straight up”, a little stroll across town doesn’t seem too daunting.

I like walking. I have two dogs (Jenn and Luna) that I walk quite frequently, so I really don’t mind a few extra steps here and there. That being said, hiking is different. So from here on in, every weekend until I leave I will either hike or *shudder* camp with a variety of friends and training partners. Tomorrow my friend Ali and I head to Lynn Canyon, rain or shine.

I’ll let you know how it goes. However, as for today…. I need to go buy hiking boots.


Makes Sense to Me

1.05.2010 | 1 Comment

I am 5 ft, 7 in (170cm) high.

Kilimanjaro is 19, 340ft (5895m) high.

The Tyrannosaurus Rex was 43ft (13m) high.

From my observation, it would be safer for me to climb a Tyrannosaurus Rex than to climb Mount Kilimanjaro. Something to consider.


Liar, Liar Pants on Fire

1.05.2010 | 0 Comments

I need to get into shape. I can barely climb a flight of stairs in the condition I’m in right now, so climbing a mountain would be foolish, dangerous, and quite possibly the most amusing thing that someone could witness.

From here on in, I am going to eat a balanced and energizing diet. I will force myself to admit that neither cereal nor popcorn constitutes an honest meal. I will take drastic measures to ensure that I stick to my eating plan…

I have sealed all my Christmas candy and chocolate in a large, glass jar, and I have taped the lid shut.