Secrets and Lies

2.03.2010 | Protein Bar Taste Test

So, I went to yoga last night, and you would not BELIEVE what Michael did!!

Just kidding, Michael.

Ladies and gentleman… The Protein Bar Taste Test – Part 6

Exhibit G: Bio X

Brand: BioX – Protein Blast
Flavour: Creamy Peanut Fudge
First Ingredient: Pro Blast Fusion (Our unique protein blend consisting of: 100% cross flow microfiltered and ultrafiltered whey protein concentrate, calcium caseinate, soy protein concentrate, whey protein hydrolysate)

Well, this is hands down the most pretentious protein bar I’ve come across. “our unique blend…”, “cross flow microfiltered…” blah, blah, blah… BioX, please stop patting yourself on the back for having your own ‘unique blend’ of pretty much the exact same thing that every other bar has, and please start creating a product that is somewhat more, you know, ummm… edible.

I will admit that I had a great deal of difficulty trying to describe the flavour of this bar, and so far all I can say for sure is that it tasted kind of like a glob of natural peanut butter dropped onto a wet rice cake.

I actually had to check the expiration date to make sure it wasn’t past due! It wasn’t. Hey, you know, it also kind of tastes like those little Quaker Corn Bran cereal squares! Buuuuut, only if they were jammed full of Silly Putty.

I was actually getting nauseated as I was taking little bites of the Bio X to try and describe the taste. My friend who was with me at the time found this to be rather entertaining, and was delighting in the rapidly changing colours, (and goblin-esque distortions) of my face.

Needless to say, after forcing down about an eighth of the Bio X, it became intimate friends with the nearest garbage pail, and I became intimate friends with a Snickers bar.





funny girl 🙂